It's harvest time, my dad is incredibly stressed, things are looking up after taking a nose-dive, anyone who knows farmers will probably know what I'm talking about. Minute to minute decisions, ones I can't make but watch my dad agonize over. A great crop, a flooded market. Farmers who are incredibly pessimistic and gloomy but who are in love with the quality of their crop. Tenting out at the farm - we start out the night with 5 people, but other people keep showing up and creeping into the tent. 'Um, is that you, Jen?' Thinking you're doing one thing but being roused at 5 in the morning being told you get to boss people around all morning, including people who know more than you on the subject. Thankfully the people you are bossing are very nice. In spite of the stress, having a wonderful time.
But - craving alone time. Not because of the people you're hanging out with, they're the best the world has to offer. Just because you've been around people constantly for a long time. And when you get it, because you've been around your family and friends so much the last week they won't care if you ditch them for a bit, your brain is clogged and all you can do is hardly even start to think about unwinding and thinking things through. Because you can't get through that dang layer in your brain that separates reality from unreality. Not in 10 minutes, anyhow. Maybe not in a lifetime, and that scares me.